Tuesday, 4 March 2008

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OMG! Russell Brand: I tried to have sex with a vacuum cleaner

Comedian recounts time he pleasured himself as a teen

Russell Brand has revealed that he was once seduced by a household appliance.

The comedian says he inserted his penis into the nozzle of a Henry vacuum cleaner when he was 14 and then started it up.

'The lure of Henry is a force I once succumbed to as a lonely youth, it was a reckless and impetuous act,' he explains.

'I was in my teens and my options were limited; Henry was by no means my first choice — Matey is too young and Mr Muscle had a headache.'

But Russ, 32, was horrified by the experience.

'The noise he made during it was terrifying and I felt terribly guilty afterwards when I looked at his little fizzog,' he tells The Sun.

'Perhaps ultimately the manufacturers of these sexy little appliances ought be held responsible. Who in their right mind designs a machine with the capacity for suction and then puts a face on it? You might as well put eyelashes on a toaster.'

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