Monday, 4 February 2008

A Quickie with Alan Carr

Q&A Comedian Alan, 31, on dressing up and fighting celebs

Are you missing your partner in crime Justin Lee Collins on Celebrity Ding Dong?
It’s like having an arm cut off – a big, hairy arm. Of course I miss him. We were like husband and wife. But I needed a break from the stubble rash.

Which celebs would you like to see have a fight?
Britney Spears and Amy Winehouse might be good. Or Peaches Geldof. She’s horrible, isn’t she? I wouldn’t have her on the show – unless she wanted to clean the toilets.

Which star could you beat in a fight?
Stephen Hawking. Unless he reversed over me, of course!

Have you ever offended any celebrities?
I don’t think so. I dressed up as Boy George when he did community service picking up litter and I bumped into him the following week. He said hello and gave me a kiss – but maybe he hadn’t seen it. Next time I bump into him he might head-butt me.

Do you enjoy all the dressing up?
I’m numb to it these days. I’ve started recognising my wigs on other shows now. I was watching Heartbeat the other night and I thought: ‘Ooh! That’s the wig I wore as Rula Lenska!’ I swear I saw one of them on Pet Rescue – I think it was the one I had for Dannii Minogue.

Who would be your dream guest on The Friday Night Project?
We’d love to have Kylie Minogue. There are rumours that her people are talking to our people, so fingers crossed.

You’re now writing your autobiography, too.
I am – and I won’t do what Naomi Campbell did with her novel Swan and get someone else to write it. Someone would smell a rat if I started using long words and not saying ‘Ooh!’ at the start of all my sentences.

Will it contain any startling revelations?
Well, there’s the story of my secret love child… but I can’t say any more. You’ll have to buy it!

By Karen Dunn