'I'm sick of all this stuff about facial hair being back in all of a sudden,' says Joey, 21.
'It's alright for Brad Pitt and that guy who plays the pirate in Pirates Of The Caribbean [erm, that'll be Johnny Depp, Joey], but it takes me ages to grow mine.
'When I grow a 'tache it looks pathetic, like a bit of grass.
'There's a bit of hair, then a bit of stubble - it's really not a good look.
'I prefer the smooth look and I reckon girls like me with no stubble as I look cuter.'
Read Joey Essex's column in Now magazine dated 6 February 2012 - out now!
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