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Friday, 22 May 2009

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Bianca Gascoigne: I quit drinking so I don't end up like my alcoholic dad

Bianca Gascoigne reveals how she was scared into curbing her partying ways for good

Bianca Gascoigne now feels healthier

Stumbling towards the sun lounger on a bikini photo shoot in Spain last September, I tried to focus. As usual, I’d been knocking back vodka to give me the confidence to strip off.

But it wasn’t until I watched the footage later that I realised how drunk I was. The video ended up on YouTube and to date it’s had more than 300,000 hits. I was mortified by how low I’d sunk, but it was the wake-up call I needed.

Ever since I’d been old enough to drink alcohol, I’d gained a reputation in the press as a good-time girl. I’d lost count of the number of times I’d fallen out of a club drunk and for a while I worried I’d end up like my ex-footballer stepdad Paul Gascoigne, who’s fought a long battle with alcohol addiction. I can’t blame him for my behaviour, though, because it was my personal choice to drink so much.

I was used to the VIP treatment, with champagne and vodka on the table in nightclubs, and I couldn’t say no. I can’t tell you how much I drank because I could never remember. The only evidence would be some awful paparazzi shot of me being helped out of a club.

My drinking spilled over into work, too, and I couldn’t go to a public appearance without having a few. In my mind I was still the chubby little girl I used to be and I convinced myself that drinking made me more fun, attractive and interesting. I was just doing the same as a lot of other young women – but the difference was that I was in the public eye. My excuse was: ‘I’m only 22. I’ll worry about it later.’

That was until the day I watched that YouTube video. I felt so ashamed. My friends and family were always begging me to stop drinking so much and I knew it was time to do something about it. So when BBC3 approached me to take part in the transformation show Make My Body Younger, I jumped at the chance.

The programme follows people with excessive lifestyles and teaches them about the health problems they risk. I was given a ‘living autopsy’ MRI scan to see what I’d done to my brain, liver and lungs. The results were shocking. When I was told I’d cause myself irreparable damage if I carried on like I had been, I burst into tears.

During the programme I started to open up about my insecurities and I realised how much I hid behind drink, using it as a mask. I had sessions with a confidence coach and was taught breathing techniques to use before public appearances in place of the booze. Learning how to calm my nerves and boost my self-esteem without the aid of alcohol was an amazing feeling. I realised that I’m naturally bubbly and fun.

After the show I wanted to keep up the good work, so when Now approached me to go on a fasting detox in Bath, I was up for it. I was a little apprehensive because I love my food and the detox involved having no food, alcohol or caffeine for three days. All you’re allowed is a maple syrup, lemon and cayenne pepper drink when you’re hungry.

My days were spent having massages, doing water yoga and relaxing in the spa. I also exercised daily. I felt weak at first, but as the toxins drained from my body, I felt as if the negative forces in my life vanished, too. I stopped worrying about how I look. I didn’t even feel hungry.

After I left the spa three days later, I carried on the detox at home for two days, although I admit that I weakened at a family barbecue and ate a tuna steak. But the results have far exceeded my expectations. I went into it feeling sceptical and left feeling confident, enthusiastic and healthy.

I haven’t drunk alcohol for ages and I hope I’ll lose my reputation as a party girl because I’m not like that any more. My skin is clear, my nails – which I used to bite – are strong and long and my hair looks glossy. I even lost 4lb, taking me down to 9st 2lb. But the best part is the way I feel. Doing this has given me an inner confidence and I now feel ready for whatever life throws at me.

Now sent Bianca to The Royal Crescent Hotel in Bath to try the Royal Lemon Detox, £620.

See the latest pictures of Bianca Gascoigne in Now magazine dated 25 May 2009 - out now!