Wednesday, 11 May 2011

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The Apprentice: One down - Edward Hunter...

The Apprentice returns and Lord Sugar is in fine form as the first wannabe bites the dust...

Edward Hunter: Gone and quickly forgotten

Rolling with the punches. Blue sky thinking. Bottom up, not top down. Micro-managing. The Apprentice is back and they still haven't learnt to speak like normal human beings.

Lord Sugar is as curmudeonly and sarcastic as always, Nick Hewer looks dour and Karren Brady looks mildly exasperated. Brilliant.

The first task this series was simple. Each team [Venture for the girls and Logic for the boys] got £250 to spend on fruit and veg and turn into profit. Simple, yeah? Of course not!

The girls decided to go for fruit salad [good idea] and vegetable pasta [not such a good idea]. Strangely they only spent about £170 rather than the whole amount.

Highlights included half the team not sending the other half any more stock, one candidiate unable to spell the word ‘vegetable' and Evil Edna - already my least favourite candidate for her sneering attitude and unbelievable self belief.

Project manager Melody Hossaini (who we are led to believe was personally trained by the Dalai Lama, Desmond Tutu and David Beckham*) also received high praise from her teammates despite the fact she was a bit rubbish.

The boys went for orange juice and soup, both good ideas. However, team leader Edward Hunter left half of his team a pittance to spend on all the soup ingredients.

They then broke the juicers and didn't get selling until lunchtime. Edward (both the youngest and the shortest in the team - his words not mine) also kept the entire business plan in his head including all of the accounts and refused to share it with anyone else.

He made it up as he went along, spoke in rubbish soundbites and refused to use his accountancy skills (what with him being an accountant) because in his heart he felt he was a wheeler dealer. Del Boy? Maybe, but I think Peckham's finest would have done a little bit better.

Unsurprisingly, Edward led his team to failure and Lord Sugar fired him. Job done.

They may not longer win a job, but £250,000 to start their own business in partnership with Lord Sugar. Good luck with that Alan, at the moment it looks like you're going to need it.

* I have only made one of these up.