Celeb Big Brother: Lucy's Out

Lucy Pinder is the first celebrity to get the boot from the Big Brother house. Oh dear...

Lucy Pinder: Celebrity Big Brother 6 | Celebrity Big Brother 6 contestants revealed | Now magazine | Celebrity gossip

Lucy Pinder gets evicted. See you then. Bye.

Oh well Lucy’s gone, what a shame. No really, I may look happy to the untrained eye, but really I’m crying inside. I don’t think the house will miss her and it’s not even like the blokes watching will as, despite earning her living flashing her baps, they didn’t get much of an airing inside the house. Also, she had better not claim that she did it for the 'experience' when before she was even out the front door she was asking for her fee. Classy.

Shame Ulrika didn’t go as for once I do believe she wants to see her family. Having said that, the fact that it means she can’t grab her cheque as quickly as she planned and make a run for it cheers me up quite a bit.

Coolio is doing a great job of winding everyone up in the house. I would probably want to throttle him by now if I was in there [especially the ridiculous ‘character’ he made up yesterday] however I’m not in there, I’m at home, so I’m quite liking the fact he's irritating everyone so much.

This year’s celeb BB appears not only be more random, but more paranoid than ever before. It’s not often in the Big Brother house you hear Geordie voiceover man say that, rather than behaving inappropriately, the housemates have been ‘philosophising’. Even more bizarre was it was La Toya who was doing it while also sharing a story about her brother asking Marlon Brando for advice on religion. Odd does not even begin to cover it.

However, I still like La Toya, Verne is brilliant and Terry continues to grow on me despite my better judgment. I wish Mutya would do a bit more and I’d put money on Tina going postal before the end of the competition. She also wins scariest moment of the series so far when she was sat in the garden wearing a facemask, which made her look rather like Hannibal Lecter on a fag break.

I’d also like to give a special mention to Ben who, although quiet,
could be emerging as my favourite. This is mainly based on the fact
that he said to Tina: ‘I tell you what if you’re up for very quick
disappointing sex then I am here.’ He is also the king of the bad pun
[something I have made a career out of] and clearly fights a daily
battle with carbs if his licking of crisps is anything to go by.

Tommy is starting to grate on me a little and seems to be the main one stirring up the paranoia. No Tommy, if you dance with Michelle I can promise you, we will not think you are having an affair. They are obsessed with how they are edited and therefore I salute BB for then giving them a task, which played on their fears.

May I salute BB for the tasks so far this year. My particular favourite being worshiping at the alter of Chesney Hawkes as well as remembering random facts about him [for example Chesney would rather live as a rat for a year than have the face of a rat for his whole life. Obviously.] The fact that the man himself even put in an appearance made it all the better. I met him once. He was a lovely man, although he was topless for the entire interview, which was slightly unnerving. I would also like to assure you that it was not at my request.

They didn’t exactly put much effort in though did they? Bunch of failures. They say they don’t mind now, but I can see arguments ahead when Coolio eats all the cornflakes. Or something like that.