The X Factor: Au revoir Austin

Daniel amazingly beats the chop and Austin goes in The X Factor sing-off...

Austin Drage: Appearing at a Butlins near you soon

How the hell did Daniel survive The X Factor chop this weekend? I’m sure he’s a nice bloke, but he looks like an embarrassing uncle doing karaoke. I don’t want my popstars to look like Daniel. Or sing like him for that matter. British public, I am disappointed in you.

I’m also fed up of every song choice he has sees him crowbarring in something about loss or upset so we feel sorry for him.

I do, however, feel sorry for Austin getting the boot as I think he sang better than Rachel in the final showdown and in the show itself. At least he didn’t forget his words – surely an X Factor cardinal sin?

I’m also confused as to how tall Austin is? He looks like a midget. Neither Dermot or Simon are particularly tall and yet they both towered over Austin, as did most of the girls. Now I’m vertically challenged myself, but I’m considering standing next to Austin just to make myself look average height.

I know I am in the minority here, but I don’t get why everyone thinks Diana is so great. I find her voice really annoying and desperately want to give her hair a good brush. I also struggle to understand why all the judges were praising Brian’s dance routines tonight when they were even less impressive of those on Britannia High. They were either Pans People-esque or simply as camp as Christopher Biggins dressed up as a pantomime dame. In a fetish club. Alex’s topless dancers I found particularly upsetting.

I do however like Eoghan despite Louis Walsh using the phrase ‘the cute factor’ to describe him every week and the fact that his hair seems to get bigger and bigger as the weeks go by. I also have £20 on him to win, although I have a feeling I may be losing out on that punt. I also like Laura, Alex and JLS. The first two girls for their voice and the band because they seem like nice blokes.

I'm still loving Cheryl, especially the fact that she doesn't take any rubbish from Simon and I'm still bored of Dannii. Dermot has been letting the side down recently too – for example the link: ‘Don’t dis-go anywhere’. I wouldn’t even expect this of Brucie over on Strictly, so I certainly don’t expect it of the lovely Dermot. However, Holly Willoughby is doing ITV2 proud on the Xtra Factor and I would like to say massive congratulations to her on her pregnancy news. See I can be nice sometimes.