Wednesday, 23 April 2008

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Now that's what I call TV

TV highs, TV lows and scraping the bottom of the barrel courtesy of Heather Mills...

Heather is exactly like her dad

I would like to apologise for the lack of blogs recently. I have been very busy and may have been slightly distracted by my excitement that Heroes returns on Thursday.

Anyway, to make up for your loss [I'm sure many of you have been devastated] I thought I would do a lovely compilation blog in the style of those top ten shows Channel 4 are so fond of. I will be your solo talking head, giving you 'witty' quips and 'serious' insights into the world of TV. Or something like that.

So to begin, I love the BAFTA TV awards. It's the one time of the year I can get on my soap box and rant about how great British TV is. Everyone moans about how it's dumbing down, but if you just look past the trash there are great shows like Boy A, Peep Show, Malcolm And Barbara: A Love's Farewell, Skins, Shameless, The Mark Of Cain, Harry Hill's TV Burp - the list goes on. I love telly me and I wish others did too.

Next up is Shipwrecked. I have a feeling that if I had made it on to either Tigers or Sharks Islands this year I would by now have spent most of my time hidden in the undergrowth gently rocking and whispering: 'Shut up, shut up, shut up!' at pretty much all of the other islanders. Especially the Scouse girl who makes having your ears chewed off by an angry hermit crab seem like a more pleasant option.

However, if I had made it to Hawk island, unlike moany irritant Sarah, I would have embraced the survival element. I really like James, Nick and Char. My only slight problem is my boyfriend has a bit of a thing for Char who is tall, blonde, skinny and posh. So the total opposite of me then. Hmmmm. He also appears to have a bit of a man crush on Steve Jones after laughing at him throughout T4 on Sunday and declaring him 'really rather funny'.

Britain's Next Top Model returned for a new series on Monday and they were certainly a better looking bunch of girls than last year although they were a total shower of backstabbing bitches as always. To be honest when I tuned up in Cape Town to meet last year's final four I have to admit we all nearly mistook the models for members of the production crew.

I'm still undecided on the new judges though as I still miss mentalist Paula Hamilton and the wonderful Jonathan Phang. Gerry DeVaux is overly groomed and a bit bizarre, while Huggy Ragnarsson is good, but has lips so big she could be the lovechild of Mick Jagger and Leslie Ash.

I was rather disappointed by the Heather Mills McCartney documentary on Tuesday evening. I didn't learn anything new about Heather at all. The only thing it did prove to me was that Heather Mills is exactly like her dad.

And finally, for those of you who didn't see it here's Gordon Brown caked in make up on American Idol Gives Back. Not only have I now realised that I prefer it when our Prime Minister doesn't smile [because quite frankly when he does he looks freaky], but the décor in 10 Downing Street really needs some work – somebody call The Beeney. Quickly!