Wednesday, 11 January 2012

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Now Says

Esme Riley

I love a celebrity baby, but Blue Ivy's first 'picture' is a shocker

Are baby Blue Ivy Carter and Harper Seven Beckham destined to be beautiful models? Nah!

Harper Seven Beckham is adorable

Nothing gets me more excited than news a celebrity's pushed out a child (except maybe a photo of Harry Styles naked).

'Baby joy! Baby joy!' we chant around the office before speculating what they'll be called, what colour hair they'll have and what clothes they'll wear.

We then (im)patiently wait for the little one's first photo - because we want to know just how cute the latest arrival is. 

Nine out of ten times they're adorable - Orlando's offspring Flynn Bloom, for example, I believe is perfection; and Selma Blair's little boy Arthur is cute beyond belief.

But sometimes - just occasionally - the bubba has chubby cheeks and 'potential' rather than model baby looks.

My thoughts are prompted by 50 Cent's recent jokey Twitter post of a mocked-up photo of what he thinks Beyoncé Knowles and Jay-Z's baby Blue Ivy might look like.

The rapper has Photoshopped Jay-Z's very masculine adult face on to a baby's body - and it's a little creepy.

Because, let's face it - everyone hopes Beyoncé's daughter will have inherited her mum's bootylicious looks in miniature.

There's no denying she'll be ridiculously talented when she grows up (is it possible to be jealous of a 4-day-old?), but she's not guaranteed to be gorgeous.

Let me give you an example: Rumer Willis and her sisters didn't necessarily get the best combo of Bruce Willis or Demi Moore's genes, did they?

And there's even one of us in the office (not me, I'd like to add) who thinks Posh's fashionista daughter Harper Seven Beckham is ugly. (Gasp!) 

Harper's button nose, designer dresses and fluffy hair aren't enough to charm my colleague (who shall remain unnamed) and sincerely hopes baby Becksy will improve with age.

But let's not feel too sorry for any 'plain' celeb babies out there, because if they don't sprout into stunners, they can simply spend some of their millions on a trip to the plastic surgeon.

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Esme Riley

Twitter: @Esme88